(feat. Fall Out Boy)

See there was Ashley,
She caught my eye the second that she passed me
I kissed her once
Then she started to harrass me
She called all night long
I had to buy a brand new phone.

And let me see
There was Mellony
To have a mouth like that should be a felony
Wouldn't believe half the shit that she was tellin me
I mean dirty vocab
She used to talk like she was drunk.

And after that was Tiffany
The one with the cute cousin
Are you kiddin' me?
She had a man
But that didn't mean shit to me
He tried to catch us all the time
But I was just to Goddamn smooth.

And I can't forget to mention Carrie
But that situation quickly got scary
Coz after 2 days she was like "let's get married"
Can you believe that shit?
I had to pack my bags and move.

(1, 2, 3, 4!)

Where is your boy tonight?
I hope he is a gentleman.
Where is your boy tonight?
Maybe he won't find out.

Where is your boy tonight?
I hope he is a gentleman.
Where is your boy tonight?
Maybe he won't find out...

I'll always remember Monica,
The Jewish chick
She'd always give me gifts for Chanukkah
To met her folks she'd try and make me rock a harmonica
But she looked so damn good
She almost made my ass convert

And after that there was Lisa
She had a twin sister, Teresa
I bumped into them at Cam's gettin pizza
The greatest night of my life
Schleps to rock that kill to birds

And there was Erica,
She had the stinkiest breath in North America, (I know)
I tried to slip her tic tacs
But they were scared of her
And when we made out
I always had to plug my nose

And I supose your know the sister
Shoot, I swear by hand and God
I only kissed her
I gotta foot fetish
But she gotta lota blisters
I mean hammer time feet
You think she had walked from Boca Raton

Where is your boy tonight?
I hope he is a gentleman.
Where is your boy tonight?
Maybe he won't find out.

Where is your boy tonight?
I hope he is a gentleman.
Where is your boy tonight?
Maybe he won't find out.

Remember Catherine?
She talked so much
I used to make her bring me aspirine
Blah, blah, blah, blah
I'm doin' fine thanks for askin'
I even tried to make a muzzle
But her mouth would just not quit.

Oh Shit,
Remember Shuana.
I hate to bring her up again,
I didn't want her.
That girl I talked about
In "That's A Girl's Dog" song
Yeah, the poster girl from Pac Sun
Almost made me lose my grip.

And oh shit,
There was Krystal.
The meth head
She used to sniff like a fist full.
One time she chased me down thr street with a pistol.
She tried to say I took her stash,
She bugged out and tryed to kill my ass.

And at last we got Kimmy,
She went abroad
Came back,
And broke up with me
And so I ripped up all them letter that she sent me.
I cried for like 3 days,
Then it was back to my evil ways.

Where is your boy tonight?
I hope he is a gentleman.
Where is your boy tonight?
Maybe he won't find out.

Where is your boy tonight?
I hope he is a gentleman.
Where is your boy tonight?
Maybe he won't find out.

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