I'm such a wreck. I can't sit still. I count the leaves on the windowsill. Any time now you'll appear. It's nice to know that you're still here, but not the way I want you to be. When you smile it just goes through me. How much longer will it take for what's left of my heart to break? When I want them and I just can't find them, and it's all because of you. And if you have got them when you don't need them give them back to me again. Of all the stupid things I made myself believe, the dumbest one is that you'd never leave. I can't afford to keep you hanging by a thread. It makes me wish that we were dead. I think I've always made it clear. I always want you to be near, but times have changed. You've changed your mind, and I haven't got the time to take to make you want to know me. What it takes you just won't show me. I still see you in my living room. I've had enough. I spoke too soon. You're like my favorite shirt that just won't fit. It's in my drawer, but I can't wear it. Get over it, get rid of it. Anger. Fury. Of all the stupid things I made myself believe, I really thought you'd give me back my car keys. I just don't know what I can do or what to say, and I can't even drive away

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